Billie Eilish was able to peel back the layers of her sexuality while working on a song called “Lunch,” which is featured on her forthcoming album, “Hit Me Hard and Soft.”
“That song was actually part of what helped me become who I am, to be real,” the Grammy winner, 22, told Rolling Stone for her May 2024 cover story, published Wednesday.
“I wrote some of it before even doing anything with a girl, and then wrote the rest after.”
“Lunch” centers on Eilish having such a big crush on a girl that she “likens sex with her to devouring a meal,” according to the magazine. (“Hit Me Hard and Soft” will be released on May 17.)
“I’ve been in love with girls for my whole life, but I just didn’t understand — until, last year, I realized I wanted my face in a vagina,” the “Happier Than Ever” singer further admitted.
Eilish had only dated men publicly, and her most recent relationship was with singer-songwriter Jesse Rutherford.
In May 2023, the “Bad Guy” singer’s rep confirmed to Page Six exclusively that the pair had broken up after less than a year of dating but remained “good friends.”
The former couple had sparked speculation that they were on the outs when Eilish went to last year’s Met Gala without Rutherford, 32, and was then seen getting cozy with actress Ava Capri at an afterparty.
The “What Was I Made For?” songstress told Rolling Stone that she was “never planning” on discussing her sexuality publicly “in a million years” and feels it’s “really frustrating” that it has become a talking point.
In November 2023, Variety published an interview with Eilish, in which she revealed she was “physically attracted” to women but admitted she was also “so intimidated” by their beauty and presence.
The “Ocean Eyes” singer did not label herself at the time, but shortly after, a red carpet reporter for the same outlet asked Eilish whether she had meant to “come out” in the article.
“I didn’t [know I was coming out], but I kinda thought, wasn’t it obvious?” she responded at the time. “I didn’t realize people didn’t know.”
Eilish told Rolling Stone that she answered the question because she didn’t want to be rude but still felt a little exploited and wishes she hadn’t commented.
“I went into Billie Eilish interview mode, [like], ‘Oh, I don’t care. Yeah, I’ll say whatever. Wasn’t it obvious?’” the “NDA” singer explained. “And then afterwards I was like, ‘Wait. It wasn’t obvious to me.’”
After the red carpet chat, Eilish took to social media to call out Variety for “outing” her “at 11am instead of talking to [her] about anything else that matters.”
“I’m lucky enough to be in a time when I’m able to say something like that and things go OK for me,” the “Wish You Were Gay” singer recognized to Rolling Stone. “That’s not how a lot of people’s experience is.”
Eilish concluded that at the end of the day, “Who f–king cares?” about the outside noise.
“The whole world suddenly decided who I was, and I didn’t get to say anything or control any of it,” the “Everything I Wanted” singer added.
“Nobody should be pressured into being one thing or the other, and I think that there’s a lot of wanting labels all over the place. … It takes a while to find yourself, and I think it’s really unfair, the way that the internet bullies you into talking about who you are and what you are.”
