Editor’s Note: The following contains full spoilers for ‘Baby Reindeer’. It also discusses themes of sexual violence relevant to the series.
The Big Picture
- “Baby Reindeer” explores the story of a failed comedian named Donny who is being stalked by a woman named Martha.
- Donny’s traumatic past is revealed in the season and it shapes his present behaviors, helping audiences to understand him.
- The shocking revelation unveils deeper layers to Donny’s trauma beyond Martha’s stalking.
Baby Reindeer is a harrowing drama. It is a tale of obsession and shame and is unique in that it explores the role of masculinity in downplaying the sexual violence that men experience. The series was created and written by Richard Gadd and is based on a true story about his personal experience with a stalker in his late 20s. The Netflix limited series is extraordinary, all at once heart-breaking, humorous, and subsequently terrifying. Donny’s (Richard Gadd) attempts to extract himself from a living hell fraught with shame and trauma are exacerbated by the manic and deeply disturbed Martha (Jessica Gunning). The series of events is nothing short of addictive, leading the audience through a maze of twists and turns. Gadd shows exceptional vulnerability as Donny, undermining audience expectations with a shocking revelation halfway through the season. The revelation about Donny’s sexual assault will change the way people think about sexual trauma and explain Donny’s behavior throughout the series in a heartbreaking backstory.
What Is ‘Baby Reindeer’ About?
Donny is an aspiring comedian working in a pub and living at his ex-girlfriend Keely’s (Shalom Brune-Franklin) mother, Liz’s (Nina Sosanya) house. He languishes in a type of arrested development, a stagnant art-school drop out who just can’t seem to get it together. The boys at the pub hardly respect him, subjecting him to cruel jokes and barbs. Their toxic masculinity is an alienating force that finds Donny seemingly all alone and unloved in a city far away from his family. On top of it all, Donny’s comedy dreams seem to be dead in the water. As a bizarre prop-comic, his “anti-comedy” act fails to impress. The act can be off-putting, weird, and sometimes just downright unfunny.
Enter Martha, a disbarred lawyer fresh off a prison stint for criminal stalking. Martha is quite taken with Donny, instantly becoming obsessed with him as he seems to be the only person willing to give her the time of day, or in this case, a cup of tea. From that single act of kindness on, Martha becomes obsessed, going to great lengths to establish a relationship with Donny and embedding herself into his life. Donny’s relationships suffer under the stalking as she threatens the stability of his precarious living situation, sabotaging his budding relationship with the beautiful Teri (Nava Mau), and generally wreaking havoc on the poor man’s life in ways that can sometimes seem harmless and even funny but quickly turns disturbing.
Why Is Donny’s Revelation So Shocking In ‘Baby Reindeer’?
About halfway through the series, Donny parts from the main narrative to tell the audience just how he got to be in this predicament, going back to his beginnings as a comedian when he decides to join the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, a yearly comedy festial that takes over the city. Like many artists, Donny left his humble home for the lights of the big city to find fame as a comedian. Performing his comedy act to lackluster audiences in and out of Edinburgh pubs for what seems like an eternity, until he finally gets his big break. One night, after scooping up a VIP card to a members-only club in Edinburgh, Donny meets Darrien, a successful writer on one of Donny’s favorite TV shows. The two form a fast friendship with Darrien helping Donny to develop his act, though his help comes at a cost that quickly becomes clear when Donny reveals Donny frequently drugged and raped him during this time.
The shocking revelation that Darrien sexually abused Donny over months and years is genuinely heartbreaking. What makes this revelation so startling is the frequency with which the abuse happened, and that Donny can’t stop himself from going back to Darrien’s, even being conscious of the abuse. This may seem counter-intuitive to some, but it expertly highlights the complex relationships that victims have with their abusers. Compounding this shame is Donny’s internal struggle to reconcile his abuse with his sexual identity, which further alienates him from his girlfriend Keeley. This shame becomes a prison that traps Donny in a world that cuts him off from the people he loves the most and makes him seek the validation that Martha so readily gives.
Darrien’s Abuse of Donny Is at the Root of ‘Baby Reindeer’s Story
The truth of Donny’s past makes him a deeply sympathetic character as we learn that a lot of his character quirks come as a result of his abuse. The shame spiral he’s caught in is the root of his self-hatred and Darrien’s assault has become the event that has eroded his entire life. His inability to take action to prevent Martha from further disrupting his life is a product of this shame and isolation. It is why he takes so long to report her to the police. Because of Darrien, Donny is full of self-loathing and Martha’s attention comes very easily at a time when his comedy career is floundering. Trapped in this cycle with Martha, the trauma and shame eradicate his ability to love others, costing him his relationship with Teri.
Before the Edinburgh episode, the series’ narrative has a comedic tinge. Donny is clearly a victim of Martha’s stalking, but he, himself, is also kind of an unlikeable character. He seems like a flake and jerk who seems to enjoy the attention that Martha gives him. When he reveals that he’s lied to Teri about his identity after meeting her on a trans dating app, the audience is left to wonder if the protagonist is transphobic and embarrassed by his feelings for Teri. In this light, it makes watching Donny squirm under Martha’s proverbial thumb feel somewhat justified — at least until Martha sexually assaults him by the canal. Donny’s behavior might initially come off as dysfunctional and dishonest, but it makes perfect sense in the context of his abuse. The revelation about Darrien and Donny’s relationship changes the narrative and raises the emotional stakes for the audience as all hearts bleed for Donny.
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Suddenly, everything about his relationships, specifically with Teri and Keeley, makes sense. The assault has made him uncertain about his sexuality and struggles with physical intimacy. It all comes to a head during Donny’s performance where he stops his anti-comedy routine and tells the world what happened to him. It is recorded by someone in the crowd and the story quickly goes viral. The people in Donny’s life now know the truth about his abuse. It’s only after coming out and telling the truth about what happened that Donny begins to heal.
This happens in a major way when Donny finally comes out to his parents and then reveals what Darrien did to him. Donny questions whether his parents will see him as less of a man after learning what happened. But, in a cathartic moment, Donny’s father, who has been perceived as a gruff and no-nonsense man, reveals that he is also a victim of sexual assault by simply saying that he was raised in the Catholic Church. Father and son embrace each other and Donny finds a measure of peace after this moment of honesty.
Baby Reindeer is streaming on NETFLIX in the U.S.
