DEAR DEIDRE: AM often woken in the night by my boyfriend having intercourse with me.
I sometimes push him off and other times I pretend to be asleep to get it over with quickly.
He’s 39 and he doesn’t seem to care for me. I’m 34 and he knows that I was abused by an uncle when I was a little girl.
My boyfriend knows I don’t like anal sex but he doesn’t give me any choice.
He seems to use me for sex and expects me to act like his skivvy, cleaning up after him and making his meals.
Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team
The abuse by my uncle stopped when I was 13 and started my periods. I never told anyone.
I know my boyfriend is assaulting me but if I report him, will I have to reveal my child abuse too?
I’m terrified about the family fallout if I accuse my uncle.
This is so distressing.
DEIDRE SAYS: Your boyfriend is taking advantage of your vulnerability, he’s raping you and this has to stop.
If he loved you, he wouldn’t want to hurt you.
He is not somebody you should be with. He needs to understand that this is a crime.
You deserve to be loved and with somebody who appreciates you.
Get some urgent help through rapecrisis.org.uk (0808 802 9999) who won’t pressure you but can help you to decide what you want to do.
If your uncle still has access to young people, after you get professional help you may change your mind about reporting him too.
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